If You Are in Crisis Right Now
Maybe you are being swept along
by powerful feelings and they frighten you. Are you
afraid you are losing it—that is, losing your ability to
stay present and make rational decisions to keep yourself safe?
If that is you right now, please
keep reading this. I have a couple of ideas that I think
may be helpful. I have dealt with others when they have
been very, very upset and I have been able to help them.
And I hope I can do the same for you, even though we are
not talking face to face.
If you can, please think of a
person you know who is kind and caring. At least they
have been to you a time or two. Who would that be?
Can you see their face in your
mind’s eye?
Picture their warm smile and
their kind eyes. Recall a time they showed some real
interest in you. This may take a few moments, and that is
okay. Is their pleasant, caring face coming to you?
Now try to keep that nice image
right there with you. Hold it and take a deep, slow
breath—way down deep into you lungs. The image of
your friend along with the deep breath…
Can You Do that for Three Deep
Breaths? Sure you can. Let’s do it right
now…
Talk to that person right now,
and out loud. (I know, it sounds silly and feels silly.
That’s what it’s like working with me.
I have one dopey idea after another. But every now
and then I happen on a good one…and maybe this one will
be good for you!)
Tell them what you are going
through, but just enough to get the general idea across.
Not too many details. Just the gist. Tell
them where you are, how you feel. Ask them how they are,
and what they are doing. Ask them if they have a few
moments to talk with you. See their gentle, caring face.
“Sure I do,” is their answer.
Perhaps you are already feeling
just a tiny bit calmer. Not all better, I know. But
a little better.
Now, let’s think about
someone in your real world that you can talk to right now.
Who can you call? Is The Kind Person available?
Where would you get their phone number? You could
give a call and just talk to that person, or someone else, for
a few minutes.
Maybe you have always felt a
strong need to keep your weaknesses private. You may feel
ashamed. To you it may feel risky to ask for help and
reveal some of your vulnerability…
Think this through and consider
the possibility that by now it will be worth MORE to you to
TELL than not tell. Maybe you would find it easier to
start by writing The Kind Person a short note. (Or maybe you
sit down to write a short note and it grows into a long note!
That suggests that you really need to talk!)
We Are All the Walking Wounded…
I would like to help put some
distance between you and your strong feelings of shame.
Shame pushes folks to remain closed, secretive and
isolated even when your flaws or weaknesses are only
About-as-bad, About-the-same as all the rest of ours. You
may be pulling into your shell like a turtle without realizing
that all the rest of us have plenty of flaws as well!
I hope you are feeling just a
tiny bit calmer now that we have spent a few moments together.
I know it doesn’t all go away quickly—in fact
you may sense your pain as background noise that never really
goes away.
Right now it is enough to make a
little progress and celebrate small, even minute-to-minute
victories—right?
Hey—I am glad you stopped by to
see my web site. How about going back to the beginning of
this site, at the menu, and reading one more article.
Can you?
Or what about making that call?
Or maybe you have a better idea…
