Are you living in fear of a threatening, explosive, even dangerous man?  Do you have to walk on eggshells around him?  Do you and your children love to see him drive away from your home and dread when he comes back?

 That’s an exhausting way to live isn’t it?

 Maybe you want to tell me right away that he ISN’T ALWAYS THAT WAY.  Maybe you want to tell me that a lot of the time he can be nice.  Or you feel a responsibility to bring some of his good qualities to my attention.  I understand.

 You are confused about him, aren’t you?  Any time he is being nice, you remember that he can turn nasty in a second.  And any time he is being mean, you know that he can feel very sorry and meek a minute later.  So what do YOU do about this volatile world you live in?  Just hang on and hope for the best?  Have you been trying that method for a long time now?  And are you getting tired?

 There are some articles I have for you to read that may point to options you haven’t thought of before.  You may very well see yourself and your mate in them.  I think you will find them enlightening.  

First, read the chapter from the 10 by 10 workbook entitled “He Usually Isn’t THAT Bad” that is posted at the end of the article If You Are a Girl Dating a Controlling Male.  It may give you a lot of insight about yourself, your mate and the whole dance the two of you have been doing.  Then with your new insight you may see new options for yourself.  I suggest you also step over to the article If You Are You a Man with an Anger Problem Right Now from this section.  This will almost surely provide a shocking new perspective for you: that the man is responsible for controlling his own feelings and behavior.  You are not the cause of his anger, and as much as you may care about him, you can’t fix it for him either.  He has to.  Have a look.  It will give you a lot to think about.